This piece is based on a dream that began as a nightmare and ended as a sweet dream. As background, the night before, I had suffered terrible nightmares all night long. My husband woke me up at least twice, but when I fell back asleep, the nightmares came right back. That morning, I managed to teach my yoga class without letting on, then came home and stumbled into bed. I then began this dream: In the dream, I was driving, but I was so exhausted, I knew I shouldn't drive. I pulled over into a parking lot, where some kind of childrens camp was happening. I got out of the car and staggered around, losing both my iPhone and my iPad. I tried to support myself on a concrete column, but was sliding down. A man came and said, "I'm a doctor, I'm going to help you." He supported me and helped me lie down. Another man came over and said, "I'm a doctor, too, and I'm going to help you too." Both of them were treating me. Then a third man came and said, "I'm a doctor, too, and I'm going to help you too." I was saying, "I want my Mommy." This is a strange thing, because I never, as far back as I can recall, thought of my mother as a source of help and comfort. Then a woman came, with a kitty and a bunny and let me pet them. I started to feel a little better. One doctor said, "I'm done, now," and left. Then the second doctor said, "I'm done, now," and left, too. Then the first dooctor said, "Your blood pressure has come down now." And I asked, "Does that mean I'm better now?"
And, I woke up.
I completely woke up. I went from dream to wide awake in a nanosecond, I think. I had that moment of disorientation, then I said, "Thank you, God, for taking care of me." All the agitation of the nightmares the night before was gone, and I felt at peace.
Here is my interpretation: the three doctors were God, in the Persons of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. And, the woman was my mother, who died just around a year ago. She love kitty-cats, as she always called them. And she owned a bunny, as she called him, for some time. In life, she was never a source of help or comfort. She had never been nurtured herself. I think she did love us, inside, but she didn't know how to be a mother in the first place, and, when her alcoholism took over, her tendency toward neglect became even worse. But now, she is in Heaven. She is the person she was always supposed to be, the person God created her to be. So, in the dream, she brought the kitty and the bunny to be a comfort to me.
It started as another nightmare, and ended sweetly. When does that ever happen? I consider that dream a gift.
I created this piece using the Sketch Club app for iPad, August 12th, 2013.